Hold Your Tongue

But I say unto you, That every idle word that men shall speak, 
they shall give account thereof in the day of judgment. 
Matthew 12:36

True faith will control the tongue. The Book of James is our most prominent resource for learning the importance of productive faith. It is imperative for any Christian to consider their works, not because works earn us a place in heaven (the grace of God does that) but because faith without works is ineligible for grace. Because faith without works is dead (James 2:14).

There is an important component to faith that is not often talked about or reflected upon: the ability to control the tongue. The work, in faith, the faithful act of restraint. The ability to bridle oneself, as James teaches in James 3:2-8:

"For in many things we offend all. If any man offend not in word, the same is a perfect man, and able also to bridle the whole body. Behold, we put bits in the horses' mouths, that they may obey us, and we turn about their whole body. Behold also the ships, which though they be so great, and are driven of fierce winds, yet are they turned about with a very small helm, withersoever the governor listeth. Even so the tongue is a little member, and boasts great things. Behold, how great a matter a little fire kindles! And the tongue is fire, a world of iniquity: so is the tongue among our members, that is defiles the whole body, and sets on fire the course of nature; and it is set on fire of hell. For every kind of beasts, and of birds, and of serpents, and of things in the sea, is tamed, and hath been tamed of mankind: But the tongue can no man tame; it is an unruly evil, full of deadly poison." 

Matthew 7:18 explains that what is within will come out; in its specific words: a good tree cannot produce evil fruit, nor can a corrupt tree cannot produce good fruit. People and circumstances will provoke us to anger and impatience, and if we have not done the faithful work of cultivating peace inside, we will spew such ugliness right back at them. 

How do we do work on the inside? We adopt the perspective of Jesus; we rely on the promises of God. From Jesus' vantage point, every person deserves our love; and God's promises are of restitution and justice. We do work on the inside by humbling ourselves and reminding ourselves that faith without works is dead. Ego fuels our temper and supplies the nasty words and tone that corrupt our speech. If we proudly understand and accept ourselves as servants of God, we will serve Him. And in the manner He has requested. We are asked to love others, we are asked not to render evil for evil. We consistently remind ourselves that faith without works is dead because God knows people by their works (Matthew 25:35-40). Anything we do on behalf of another is service to Him. (And, horrible but necessary reminder, to harm someone is to harm him). We remind ourselves that we want to be known by God for our righteous actions, not by unrighteous ones, or by altogether inactive faith. We must build our character! Since we all fall short (Romans 3:23) there is always something within us to improve upon.

In the process of learning to restrain our tongues, it can be helpful to review the day before bed. Think about what could have been done better, as well as what was done well. Endeavor to do better, to alter what needs to be fixed, to build upon what was done well. Likewise, it can be helpful to begin the day by setting the mind to conscious effort in faith. Like a priming, a preparation for the day makes one more apt to respond intentionally (aligned with God's manner, rather than subject to the body's rampant emotions) and thus productively.

And ultimately, review always, the heart. Peace and light will produce peace and light. A noxious inside will spew noxious fumes to the outside. If there is hurt or anger or fear, it will control the tongue. Only through a tight-knit, closely-clung to, consistently communicative relationship with God can those internal hurts be healed.

And plainly, learn to communicate. It is not always natural, the best ways to express oneself do not always come easily to hand. Scripture and other resources exist to help learn how best to state what is true, necessary and kind. Sometimes what others say is not what is meant. An angry word might have been derived from sadness; fear from distrust, impatience from exhaustion or circumstances wholly unrelated to the target who receives it. It is important to remember that as both the speaker and the one being spoken to.

And that inside-work becomes homework, of a sort, that takes place outside of us, in the real world. In real conversations. The work that takes place within ourselves takes place within our every day, thought and interaction. We learn from God then put into practice the concepts of patience, kindness, mercy and the like. We develop the habit, the spiritual muscle/ability, to behave according to God rather than circumstance. 

The statement "faith without works is dead" reminds us to be generous Christians within our family, friend-circles, community and world. But it is deeper than that. As children of God, we rely on Him and scripture to do a work within ourselves (mentioned in Philippians 1:6). Before we can produce fruit, good or evil, we develop. What we develop into, a producer of good or evil, depends on the characteristics, habits, values and actions we embody and hold and do and express. In other words, how well or poorly we emulate Jesus determines the type of fruit we produce. The work of sincere emulation is a work in faith we cannot neglect!

Speech is an expression of what is inside of us. What we say, and how we say it, is evidence of whether our spirit holds the reins and is in alignment with God's will and personality, or not. If we have not bridled our base emotions (our mouth, especially), we are not in control of ourselves. If we are not in control of ourselves, our spirit is subdued by our body. If our spirit is subdued, how can it work in faith?

Perhaps the person on the other side of the conversation is a bad-fruit-producing-tree and is guilty of provocation... our response is still a reflection of us, not them. If we respond caustically, we too are a bad-fruit-producing-tree. Neither they nor we, have done the work of restraining our tongue. Caustic speech is evidence of an un-mastered, unrefined, undisciplined self. 

To be provoked into a temper is a sign of spiritual immaturity or even spiritual neglect. To restrain our tongue is to learn to communicate in a righteous way; the ability to do so is derived from a righteous spirit. As we learn from James' examples, mastery over our tongue actually drives our entire body to act, react and speak in a godly manner.

The things that come out of the mouth come from the heart, Matthew 15:8 tells us. If we can only muster patience, kindness, peacefulness and even-temperament when it is easy, when it is given to us first, what is our accomplishment? God teaches us to be patient, kind, peaceful, and even tempered so that we will use it when it matters, when it is difficult to do. 

In the same vein as James 2:19 and Luke 6:32-36, which tell us that even devils believe in God (though they do not follow Him) and even evil people are kind to their friends, so do they also have an even-temperament when everything is going their way. Indeed as stated in Luke 6:35, God is kind even to the unthankful. We must learn to apply that ability to our own interactions with people.

1 Peter 3:9-17 Provides the mindset with which we accomplish the task of restraining our mouths. What we actually seek when we respond angrily to another person is restitution. We argue when things are improperly balanced; we argue because we seek the balance and restoration that will make us feel happy. Well, if we suffer for righteousness sake, happy are we (3:14). Ultimate, foundational happiness comes from a spirit in alignment with God's will and purpose. For true, faithful children of God, happiness does not come from arguing our own cause but from aligning with God's and knowing that in due time, He will support ours.

In order to love life, to have good days, we must restrain our tongue. We must not kindle fires. Rendering evil for evil will not accomplish happiness. Righteousness will do that, for God's eyes and ears are open to prayers of the righteous. Compassion, mercy and courteousness to even the undeserved renders compassion, mercy and courteousness back to us. 

James 3:9-13 Who is a wise man and endued with knowledge among you? Let him show out of a good conversation his works with meekness of wisdom...The fruit of righteousness is sown in peace of them that make peace.

Only a well disciplined person has any claim on wisdom. Speech is an action, therefore it is a work, and God watches our works for they reveal the productivity and character of our faith. Thus must we be disciplined in the act of speech. We are responsible for what we say (Matthew 12:36), we are influenced by what we hear (1 Corinthians 5:11) and we are noxious for what we busy-bodily repeat (2 Thessalonians 3:11). All aspects of conversation are components of our faith. 

Hill of Hachilah

1 Samuel 26

Saul would not amicably release his post as king; David would not forcefully take it. The position had been given to, then taken from Saul by God. The root reason why Saul would not cease his homicidal hunt for David is the same reason God revoked the kingship from him: Saul refused to heed God's counsel; a godly nation cannot be led by a godless king.

It was not because Saul was an imperfect person. All fall short of the glory of God, Romans 3:23. David was not an exception. David was imperfect. But David obeyed God. If Israel had a leader that obeyed God, they would be led into blessed places. The judgement with which their king would shape and define their nation would be informed by a perfect God.

Saul did not obey God, but losing the kingship was not a personal punishment so much as it was a divine tweak to ensure that the righteously led nation, born of Adam, Abraham, and Jacob would continue through generations. Generations that would carry scripture and this holy, wholly separate (from the way of the world), lifestyle straight to Jesus' birth and beyond. Changing the heart and life and world of countless multitudes.

Saul and three thousand men pursued David through the wilderness once again. Once again, God positioned David, the prey, to have the upper-hand. It would have been so easily, and presumably tempting, for David to end the seemingly ceaseless threat on his life. He could have committed the act and reasonably labeled it self-defense. Breathed his first breaths without constant vigilance for the enemy behind his shoulder. Instead, David chose to respect God's timeline. He chose to live longer as a hunted, innocent man because above all of that, he was a blessed man. A protected man. A man, by God, chosen to be king.

David's restraint should remind us of 1 Peter 5:10, in which we learn that our tribulations construct our character thus and prepare us for God's plan. Though terminal, Saul's position as king was sanctioned by God. David was humble enough to appreciate that it was not his authority to determine that end date, even if it meant further misery.

Is it not, in misery, that we either learn or abandon that which will determine the outcome of our situation? Is it not reasonable to see that David, while chased like a vole by a cat, had the opportunity to learn how to be king? He learned to seek counsel from God. He learned to take direction from God. He saw the state of the character of a person who had never learned those things. He witnessed how imperative it is to a nation that a king not cling to personal pursuits. He learned patience and perseverance. He learned how to lead; he learned how even a rag-tag army led, ultimately, by God very much renders the mightier army the underdog.

As there was no shortage of opportunity for growth for David, there is none for us. God is our provision and shelter as we are starved and rain upon by tribulation. We are students before his hearth even in cold and vulnerable physical, emotional states. If we allow ourselves to be. 

Saul did not. He was ashamed of himself. His desperation ate away at him, inside and out. He was a void; a bag of tumultuous wind. He lived as slave to his desire for status, power, wealth, ego. He lived in such a way that caused everything that mattered to him to die. Ashamed of himself, time and again, Saul refused to learn. He refused to abandon his plan, his methods, his timing and trade them for God's. 

Having gained entrance easily, and standing outside of a sleeping Saul's tent, David reprimanded Saul's men for their poor protection of their king. David refused to forcefully take the crown, he refused to inherit it by a lapse in an army's duty. It would be handed to him by God or he would not have it at all. Not out of ego, but humility. He would not take what God had not unequivocally determined to be his at the precise time the determined it.

And even Saul blessed David for this, and knew David would prevail over him. David's ability to place God over self was a testament even to Saul of strength not weakness. Trusting God is not inaction... it is the most active one can be. It is an internal restructuring of character, a battening of the hatches, as the world lashes and coaxes you to yield.

Are we not all David, hunted, prey to an adversary? Hunted by our own base instincts? Anger hopes to claim us. Desire, pride, greed. 1 Peter 5:8 tells us, in no uncertain terms, that our adversary prowls around, seeking to devour. Will be be devoured or we will be shaped by God? Can we withstand the growing pains, of resisting the adversaries of life, of exercising trust in God? For if we resist our adversary, it will flee, James 4:7.

Our adversary... the devil and everything that the word figuratively encompasses: Depression, disillusionment, anger, greed, arrogance, injustice, corruption, deception, danger...

How do we resist? We choose, in every moment and thought, interaction and act, what is sanctioned by God. Justice. Patience. Mercy. Discernment. Humility. Kindness. Wisdom. Harmlessness. Not to be doormat but a door, through which those who receive your righteous behavior might pass. In strength we resist when we yield not to the adversary but God, who is our strength most especially when we have none, 2 Corinthians 12:10.

We do not allow a hunter, an adversary,  (in any of its manifestations) to determine us prey. We are not prey, forced into hasty, scrappy, corrupt, hopeless or retaliatory behavior. We are children of God capable to repel whatever negative force in our life tries to lash and coax us away from righteous behavior and trust in God's choices and timing. We are not pieces moved haphazardly, we are not mere victims or byproducts of the bad things or people that happen to us, we are beloved and strategically placed by God when we allow ourselves to be, when we allow ourselves to see. To listen. To follow God to our precise place in His plan.

Hold Your Fire

1 Samuel 25

There was a prosperous sheep rancher named Nabal during the time of a sheep harvest. Nabal was married to a good, understanding and beautiful woman named Abigail but he was a churlish (rude, in a mean-spirited way) and evil man.

The sheep harvest was a time of abundance, feast and good-will traditions. For this reason, David felt that it would be a fair time to approach Nabal about a business matter. David sent ten men to greet Nabal and to deliver this message: (paraphrased) peace to you, your house and everything that you have. We have protected your sheep and your flock, (none went missing or were harmed) and now that it is the season for you to shear (thus make money from that flock) we request compensation for our protection.

Immediately Nabal mocked David, "Who is David?". It is unlikely that Nabal did not recognize David's name: David had several famous victories over the enemy Philistines. There were songs sung about David in the streets (1 Samuel 18:5-7). Nabal accused David of being a rebellious servant of the king. This was untrue, but even if Nabal had been misled to believe that David was rebellious, (more likely his greed attempted to avoid bills due), he owed David for a service performed. Instead, Nabal refused to give any food or water to David's camp, whom he declared strangers unworthy.

When David's ten men returned to him with Nabal's response, David's response was hot anger. He told his men to equip their swords. The first attempt to deal with Nabal, David sent an non-threatening, ten men with a message. This time, four hundred men would go with swords.

Pause here to consider David's response. It was a violent overreaction most probably due to ego. Innocents would die due an ill-received personal insult? We have so much to learn from the best of David, but we have just as much to learn from the worst of him. Bloodthirsty retaliation should not be in our toolkit. We will all be personally insulted. We will all receive unfair treatment. But how will we respond? Will we immediately sell ourselves as slaves to our temper? For our temper then will act hotly, hastily in a way that is no better than the initial affront!

The ancient context might make these concepts seem abstract, but though the world has changed much, humans not at all. It requires spiritual wisdom and strength to consistently respond to circumstances in life with grace and patience and even-temperament. We pray for God to avenge us on matters small and great... not out of malice or desire for harm on another person, but out of desire restoration on our behalf and correction for the one responsible for the affront.

Resuming the story: Nabal was an impossible man; he could not be reasoned with and his own servants knew it. They therefore explained the situation to Nabal's wife, Abigail. Abigail was reasonable. She listened. She gathered facts and witness statements. She determined the appropriate response and compensation. Nabal, the greedy, arrogant, hot-head, did none of this. He insulted David and the result, as Abigail was informed, would be disastrous. David and his men were on their way to settle the score.

Abigail hurried and collected hundreds of loaves of bread, bottles of wine, sheep, corn, raisons, and cakes of figs. She loaded these onto donkeys and sent her servants ahead of her (without her husband's knowledge or consent). As Abigail came down the hill on her donkey, she successfully intercepted David.

David was still angry; he said: (paraphrased) it seems that everything I have done for Nabal was in vain; he returned me evil for good. Therefore, God should return evil to Nabal and everything that belongs to him. Abigail jumped down from her donkey and ran to meet David. She bowed down to the ground in front of David and began an earnest apology. She explained that Nabal was a fool (in fact, that is the etymology of his name) and that she was not there to receive his ten men and arrange appropriate compensation. She took responsibility, and implored David to consider her interception as God withholding him from bloodshed, from avenging himself with his own hand.

She asked for forgiveness and revealed that she had brought compensation for David. But more than that, Abigail, seems to have been sent by God to cool David down and prevent him from an action he would surely regret. She lauded David for his success and blessing (all due to his righteous character). She knew, and reminded David, that God would establish him as king. And as king, would David want, on his conscience, this bloodthirsty response to Nabal's insult?

Do not be so egotistical as to require instant retaliation, none among us are exempt from injustice. Why tarnish or prevent good work done in yourself? We pray to God for blessing. Blessing comes with responsibility. It requires character. How tragic, to receive a blessing long prayed for only to realize it is undeserved! What torment, to live with a guilty conscience. Allow God to be your Abigail, your wise counsel. The one who intercepts you from doing something you will regret. Instead of instant emotional and physical reaction, pause and consult God. Allow Him to reveal an objective picture, the greater picture. Exercise restraint. You will respond wisely, appropriately when you do so.

Finally, David cooled. He blessed God for sending Abigail to him; he blessed the advice and Abigail, for preventing him from bloodshed and selfish vengeance. He admitted that without the intervention, he would have killed Nabal and his men. He accepted all that she brought him and encouraged her to return home safely. So she did; she returned to find Nabal feasting and drunk. In the morning, when he was sober, Abigail told him everything. Nabal's heart turned into stone, his heart died and so did Nabal. The Lord avenged David and caused Nabal to die.

When David heard about Nabal's death, he expressed gratitude to God for avenging him. This may seem somewhat drastic. Did Nabal deserve to die for insult and refusal to pay for a service rendered? It seems like the answer is: no. In previous chapters, God gave David permission to kill men. David was a soldier and many enemies died at his hand, his orders. Yet God held David back from killing Nabal and his men. Is the difference the personal nature of the insult? Perhaps yes, Jesus taught us to not retaliate against personal affronts (Matthew 5:43-48). As children of God, we are encouraged to allow God to balance the scales of justice in our personal lives.

And maybe the reason why God enabled Nabal to swiftly die of natural causes was because of previous, greater offenses. At the start of the chapter, it was explained that Nabal was churlish and evil in his doings. Nabal was guilty of lifelong, repeated offenses devoid of repentance. He also served as a literal and symbolic barrier to God's plan. Despite his imperfection, David was a faithful man of God and during his lifetime, he would progress the kingdom. Evil cannot thwart this greater purpose. But also, on an individual scale, God's children can count on Him to defend them and mete out justice, judgment on their behalf.




As an aside (because it is included in the chapter, albeit briefly), David then took the widowed Abigail as his wife. This seems prudent, as Abigail was a good and faithful woman. She could provide David wise counsel and he had established a precedent for actually taking it. But, David then took another wife. And technically, David already had a wife: Saul's daughter, Michal (though Saul had taken her away and remarried her to someone else). David's infatuation with women, certainly with one woman, would result in the worst mistake of his life... but that is a sermon for another time.